Saturday, November 21, 2009

God Bless Everyone


Funny experience yesterday.

Debby and I have been doing the regular Ironman village stuff and hanging out, driving around and checking out the local scenes. We went to the Arizona Mills yesterday. I must be the Arizona version of the new mall in Balzac. Anyways, stimulation overload. It is like Disneyland inside a mall. Music blaring from every store and different music in the corridors. Nothing that I can recognize at all though. I am sure the Dave Mustaine lyrics and Kerry King guitar riffs are counter productive for producing commercial spending behaviours.

The central booths are loaded with high pressure sales people. I have not done any world travelling but it must be like markets in Egypt or Turkey. You can't walk anywhere without someone wanting in your pockets. So I was walking down the walkway and I was approached by a guy that was selling protectors for iphones. Very cool scratch resistant stuff. I got suckered in and gave over the phone and was told to come back in 30 minutes. The following is the dialogue of the conversation when I came back to retrieve my phone.

"Here is your phone, all ready to go." (salesperson)
"Cool, I like how you did that, it looks like a good product." (Slayer Dan)
"Your not from around here are you?" (sales dude)
"No, why." (Slayer)
"Your actually nice, your not trying to steal my cash drawer." (sales dude)
"The guys on my cycling team are nice to you. This one time at band camp, I got into an argument with a hockey player and, ....... nevermind" (slayer dan)
"Hey whats with the tattoos, are you like an athlete. Are you an ironman?" (sales dude)
"check this out, this guy is here for ironman" he says to other sales associates.
"What the f#$k is that." says the now approaching sales not dude.
Picture the look of shock on my face now.
"It is a race, with a swim bike and run." says the sales dude who worked on my phone.

I'm standing there in the mall looking at this guy as if he just climbed out from under a rock.

"Are you shape, do you exercise lots?" says the barely functioning adult sales dude.

"Dude, look at my calves. These are so solid they can repel bullets. Look at my quads, this is Hans and this is Franz, they can tear the roof off of your car if your in an accident while you smoking, texting, injecting and whatever else you do when you drive your car! Dude, my body fat is lower then your parents mortgage rate, oh wait, they don't have one and you live on the streets!" (slayer dan)

The mall cops were really nice as they escorted Debby and I to our rental car.

have a great day.



Relentless said...

Dan: Good luck tomorrow

Marilyn said...

Awesome. Have a great race.

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