Saturday, August 11, 2012

You know you are a Cat 5 when...


So, you may of heard that some yahoo wiped out on the hill climb yesterday.  Ya, I know how stupid.  I couldn’t believe it either… as I was laying on my back at the corner of the hill climb…  wondering how I wiped out…

Anyhow, I was more than a little frustrated with my little incident yesterday.  As I was taping up my rear end (me, not my bike), I realized as bikers, sorry “cyclist” we often take ourselves too seriously.  OK, maybe it’s just me.  Anyhow, I felt the need to take a step back and recount some (yes, there are many more) of the… well, let’s call them “cycling faux pas” I have done in the past year as a Cat 5.  Some of these are more recent than I care to admit.  Enter my list of you “know you are a Cat 5 when”…

You know you are a Cat 5 when…


  •  someone compliments you on your Cat 5 tattoo and you genuinely say “thank you”
  • you are very happy with a triple chain ring on your bike…  so nice on hills!!!!
  • after shaving your legs you continually bump into doorways because you are no longer able to judge the distance between objects
  • you buy a new helmet and can’t find the visor that should have come with it
  • you see someone crumpling up their race number and wonder why they dropped out of the race right after registering
  • your legs cramp so badly during a road race that you need to stop; all the time wondering if you are allowed to ask one of the wheel cars for a ride home
  • someone starts talking about echeloning and you are uncertain if the conversation is still about cycling or if it has drifted to military tactics
  • you are unable to find a pocket for your gels on that new skin suit you are wearing.  The small one is just for keys in case you are wondering…
  • what the hell does “neutral wheel” mean???
  • you wipe out in a crit and don’t take the free lap…. Remember this one.  Could be useful someday.
  • you wipe out during a hill climb race… Admittedly this one is probably only me.


Anyhow, I thought I’d share my leanings as a Cat 5 racer and say thanks to all those on the STC team who have gently taught me about this great sport… without outright laughing in my face.  

A special thanks to Trev who would only glance down, smile and make a simple joke unsure if my question was really serious but, letting me know the answer.

6 comments:

Marilyn said...

You are priceless.

Steve P said...

LOL, Mark, I almost had coffee all over my keyboard. And then I realized that I have done these things...

Darcy G said...

You're not the only one to fall over at a hill climb...

Lampros Antoniou said...

Or not take your free lap at the TdB.

AlanO said...

Funny and oh so true. Maybe add losing your mind over the possibility of winning one of Lampros's pizzas and taking a line you have no business taking.

cyclingphysio said...

I celebrated my upgrade out of cat 5 by unintentionally hurling myself into the crash pads at tour de bowness, 3 seconds after I had come 3rd in said race to receive the above mentioned points. Thats right, crashed AFTER the race.

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